Who has never met someone who had a quarrel with his, or her father, or mother? You do not need to do any effort to imagine the bad things he starts saying about his father. What do we usually do?

Maybe with try to calm him down and try to persuade him that his father does not deserve it. But not if that person is speaking against his father so passionately. We know how much we would be risking if we tempt to go that way with him. So, what do we do?

Maybe we seek to be empathic and understand his anger against his father and end up to take his side and agree with his condemnation of his father. Thank God we are not judges, because just imagine how many people would we condemn so easily, without listening to both sides! But, maybe we do not do that. What do we do then?

Maybe we think that the wise thing to do is to stop and listen. Just listen without saying nothing. Even though it might cost us some patience and time, we stand there and listen all that hatred coming out against one’s father. Then we might encounter the same person some days after, and we listen once more the same story, the same bad things, the same hatred against one’s father. And we listen without saying anything. The same might happen a couple of times, until we start turning the other way to escape him, as soon as we notice him coming our way, because we are fed up listening the same story, the same adjectives and the same hatred.

But, suppose the person against whom that one is speaking against with hatred is YOUR father…. Suppose the one who is speaking badly against his father is YOUR brother…. What do you do?

Would you wait until you happen to meet him accedentally? Or would you rather go out of your way to meet him and see what it is that is upsetting him and making him turn against his father, YOUR father?

And when you listen to him, would you be so impassible as not to say one single word? Maybe not to offend YOUR brother?

Can you ever pretend that it does not concern you, when you are living with YOUR father, or frequent him regularly, and you know how broken hearted he is because of his son’s, YOUR brother’s, anger against him?

What will you do? Who can ever know what you can do to reconcile YOUR brother with YOUR father? Surely, nobody can ever imagine what you would be able to do to restore peace in YOUR family.

And suppose YOUR brother is that stubborn as to refuse any attempt for reconciliation and starts to speak so badly against his father, YOUR father….

Can you imagine going to YOUR father and try to console him by asking him to look at you, because you have always been faithful and respectful to him? Can you imagine approaching YOUR father and asking to forget about YOUR brother, HIS SON, and just think of you?

And can you ever imagine telling YOUR brother: “OK, you want to renounce your father definitely? But you are still MY brother. So, do not worry, let us just not speak anymore about it: you can speak against your father as much as you want, so long as you do not speak against him with me, and we continue to live like brothers?” Would you imagine that? I am sure you won’t, not until there is some love for YOUR father left in your heart!

And what about the friends of YOUR brother? Those who might let themselves be carried away by YOUR brothers hatred against YOUR father? Would you just continue to treat them as your friends? Or will you detach yourself from them, as people who do not deserve your friendship?

It is a pity that WE pray the OUR FATHER, but do not act in the same way with OUR brethren who speak evil against OUR Father? We say we love God, OUR FATHER, and do not go to seek those, OUR brothers and sisters, who have turned against Him, or just turned indeferent with regard to Him.

It is a pity how we have resigned ourselves to let OUR brethren live against God, OUR FATHER, or at least without Him. It is a pity how we can live as if nothing happened, with all those brethren speaking badly against OUR FATHER and breaking His heart because of their way of life!

Not only that, but it is a pity how we continue to pass on the message to OUR brethren that it is OK, that being in communion with their Father, OUR Father, and self ex-communicated from Him is just the same! How can it be? Or else, we might be passing on the message that OUR Father is so mercyfull that everything will be OK with Him; you can do whatever you like because He can forget very easily!

It is a real pity that there are still so many Church goers, who seem to be trying to suggest THEIR Father not to worry that there are so many of HIS sons and daughters that are lost; because He can always console Himself with them, so faithful and respectful that they are!

Can anyone of us consider himself a faithful and respectful son, or daughter, of the Father, if we are not sensitive to His broken heart and are so placid to do all our efforts to go out and seek OUR brethren to lead them to reconiliation with their Father, and OUR FATHER?

Contact Fr Paul Fenech.